We all know that our 20s are the decade of learning and growing. They’re the decade of trying new things, making mistakes, figuring out who we are, and what we want. So what does that make our 30s? For me, at least, it’s a decade all about looking forward and not backwards.
More About Progress, Less About The Past
Don’t get me wrong. Of course I learned and grew in my 20s. I’ll take the things that I have learned with me for the rest of my life. But I’m not fixating on my 20s. I’m not spending my 30s wishing I was 20 again (well, except for when I have that really bad hangover). I’m looking forward and not backwards in my 30s, and here’s why.
It’s A Decade Of New
I got married in my 30s. I’m expecting my first child in my 30s. I bought my first house in my 30s. My 30s have become a decade of new experiences and life stages for me.
I know for some this happens in their 20s, but for me, and for a lot of people I know, it’s happened mostly in our 30s. It’s like a new level of adulting has unlocked in our 30s, and it’s given me a lot to look forward and not backwards to.
I Have No Regrets
I fully lived my life in my 20s, as best as I could. Now that I’m in my 30s, I don’t really have many – if any – regrets from my 20s. I don’t have moments where I think back and say “wow I wish I could go and re-do that” or “ugh, I regret doing that.”
Are there different life choices I may have made if I had known what I know now? Sure, but who doesn’t have those thoughts. Where I am in my life right now, I don’t think I’d trade anything to go back to being in my 20s.
I Know Who I Am
Like I said before, your 20s are all about figuring out who you are, what you like, and what you don’t like. By your 30s, you know all of that. You’re more confident, in all aspects of your life, work included.
This air of confidence really helps step the tone of this decade. It really helps you frame your mindset and helps keep you on track to reaching your goals.
I Know Who My Real Friends Are
I’ll admit it – I went out a lot in my 20s. I went out every weekend, I went on vacations whenever I could, I never said no to happy hour or dinner or brunch plans. With that came having friends who were similar to me – they always wanted to be out doing things too.
I learned in my 20s that this didn’t necessarily make someone my “real” friend. It just made them my “fun” friends. Now that I’m not going out nearly as much as I used to, I don’t see or hear from these friends as much.
Instead I’m hearing and seeing my friends I’ve had since childhood – who weren’t necessarily the friends I’d constantly be going out with in my 20s.
I’ve Made A Name For MySelf At Work
In your 20s, you’re the new kid on the block at work. You’re typically the youngest person on the same, trying to make a name for yourself – or at the very least, trying to get people to remember your name.
Now that I’m in my 30s, and I have been at my company for a while, I’ve made a name for myself. I’ve become a go-to person that people rely on. I’m more confident at work and that’s definitely something that keeps me looking forward and not backwards!
My 20s Were Turbulent
Like most people’s 20s, mine were filled with ups and downs. I had some high highs, but I also had some low lows. Of course I know that my 30s won’t be scotch free, but I do know that I’m better equipped to handle some low lows than I was in my 20s.
I have more life experiences under my belt. I also have a stronger support system than I had then. Even though my 30s may have some turbulence to them, I’m hoping they won’t feel as turbulent as my 20s were.
I Actually Feel Like An Adult
Sure, you’re an “adult” in your 20s, but are you really? I know I really didn’t feel like one. I’ll admit it – I still don’t totally feel like one. But I definitely feel more like an adult now than I did in my 20s. I feel as though others see me as more of an adult, too.
Not only am I taken more seriously, but I also know how to express myself better than I did in my 20s. I also know the things that are worth speaking up about, and the times that silence speaks the volumes I don’t have to.
I Like My New Definition Of Fun
Fun in my 20s was being out and about doing things 24/7. Fun now has a totally different meaning. I’m having much more fun just staying home with my husband, or going over a friend’s house and hanging out there.
I don’t need to be out until 3 AM anymore and honestly, I don’t miss it. My FOMO is (almost!) totally gone, and that is something I’m very happy about. Another reason why in my 30s I’m not always looking forward and not backwards.
I Really Care About Less Things
I know the things I should be caring about and the things that just aren’t worth my time. I really don’t care if something’s “Insta-worthy” or needing to get that “viral” thing everyone has.
Those are all things I did care about in my 20s… and then I realized it doesn’t matter; it’s not what makes me happy. I know what makes me happy now, and you can’t try and persuade me otherwise. If that’s not worth celebrating, I don’t know what is!
Final Thoughts On Looking Forward And Not Backwards In My 30s
It seems a little unreal being at this point where I feel settled in life and want for very little. It has also been eye opening to realize just how much I’ve grown and changed since my 20s. Now I can very confidently look forward to life in my 30s rather than being stuck reveling in the past days of my 20s.
Are you looking forward in your 30s rather than backwards? What are some things that are helping you look forward? Share in the comments!