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Dating In Your 30s As a Man: 10 Tips For Success

Dating in your 30s as a man can be confusing, complicated, and overwhelming. Here are 10 tips to help you find a relationships successfully.

Dating in your 30s is a whole new ball game. It is challenging for everyone. We’re all just trying to a potential partner who ends up being the right person. The person we can love from the first date until forever, right?

Whether you’re coming out of a long-term relationship or you’ve been single for a while, it can be quite a shock to realize just how much things have changed from your 20s. 

As a man in your 30s, you probably have a lot going for you. You are confident, you are secure in your career, and you know exactly what you are looking for in a partner.

However, this can be a double-edged sword: you have higher expectations and more specific needs, which can make it harder to meet the right partner. 

Luckily, the good news is that there are many opportunities to meet new people as a 30-something. The only caveat is that it may take a bit of effort and intentionality from your end. 

If you have been wondering how to navigate the dating scene in your 30s as a man, you have come to the right place.

In this article, we will share 10 tips that can help you succeed in dating in your 30s as a man.

Whether you are single by choice or by circumstance, whether you are looking for something casual or serious, or whether you are dating online or offline, these tips will help you make the most of your dating journey.

Let’s dive right in, shall we? 

Dating In Your 30s As a Man

What is the dating scene like currently? 

In today’s dating scene, online dating is king. With the rise of dating apps, it’s easier than ever to meet people from all walks of life.

However, choosing the right dating app is a must for finding meaningful connections. Whether you seek a long-term commitment or a casual fling, consider factors such as user demographics, interface intuitiveness, and matching algorithms.

Make sure to take a look at the website reviews like eHarmony’s review from experts, which can serve as valuable guidance in selecting the right dating app that aligns with your needs.

However, with this convenience comes a downside – a lack of meaningful connections.

Many people are just looking for a quick hookup or a temporary fling.

This is why it is so important for you as a man in your 30s to be clear about your intentions and be open to meeting people in different settings.

Additionally, the dating scene is evolving.

If you have been out of the game for a while, here are some new trends that you may notice shaping the dating landscape: 

  • Open casting: People are becoming more open to dating outside their usual physical types and expectations. More and more they are choosing emotional maturity as more important than looks. 
  • Guardrailing: People are setting more boundaries and being clearer about their emotional needs, their intentions, and their availability.
  • Work/life balance: People are prioritizing their own well-being and looking for partners who share their values of balance, rest, and flexibility. Having a flashy work title or working long hours has stopped being seen as a status symbol. 
  • Wanderlove: People are more open to long-distance or international relationships. This is thanks to remote work opportunities and more people having ambitious travel aspirations.
  • Challenging stereotypes: Men are becoming more introspective and rejecting toxic masculinity norms. They are also more open to expressing their emotions and seeking support for things that they are going through. 
  • Cookie Jarring: Cookie jarring is stringing someone along to “keep them as a backup plan in case things don’t work out with the person you really want”.

These trends show that people are becoming more intentional, adventurous, and authentic in their dating choices.

If you can be these things, you will be more likely to find success as you date in your 30s. Overall, people are more optimistic about finding romance despite the challenges of the past few years.

happy couple

What struggles do men in their 30s have with dating? 

Some of the common struggles that men in their 30s have with dating are:

Finding a compatible partner:

As the dating pool shrinks and people become more selective, it can be harder for men to find someone who shares their values, goals, and interests.

It is also harder to find someone who is at a similar stage in life. 

Dealing with baggage:

Many men in their 30s have experienced failed relationships, breakups, divorce, or even cheating.

These can leave them feeling hurt, jaded, or distrustful of potential partners. 

Facing pressure:

Some men in their 30s also have to deal with pressure from their family, friends, or society to settle down, get married, or have children.

They may also feel insecure about their career status or financial stability. 

Challenging stereotypes:

Men in their 30s may struggle with outdated gender norms that expect them to be dominant, emotionless, or commitment-phobic.

In some cases, they may also face stigma or discrimination if they date outside their race, culture, or age group.

smiling couple

10 Tips For Dating In Your 30s as a Man:

If you are dating as a man in your 30s, there are some things to keep in mind as you prepare to leave the single life behind and find a life partner.

Be clear about what you’re looking for in a partner.

Are you looking for a serious relationship or just something casual?

Being clear about your intentions can help you attract the right type of partner. And avoid wasting time on dead-end affairs.

Don’t date someone who doesn’t want the same things as you or who isn’t ready for a commitment and a life partner if that is what you are looking for.

Be honest with yourself and your partner about what you’re looking for. Don’t stay in a relationship that has no future.

Confidence is key, so be confident in who you are.

Confidence is attractive. Make sure you’re comfortable in your own skin every time you walk out the door. 

Don’t be afraid to show off your strengths and accomplishments. Let yourself shine in the best light.

Also, don’t try to be something you’re not. People will appreciate your honest and real self more than trying to pretend you are something that you’re not.

Take care of yourself.

Exercise, eat well, and take care of your mental health. Being in good physical and emotional shape can help you feel more confident and attractive.

Dating takes up a lot of emotional energy and can be draining if you are not taking the time to practice self-care. Make sure to stay connected with friends, family, and hobbies that make you feel good.

Don’t settle.

As tempting as it may be to settle for someone who is “good enough,” remember that you deserve someone who checks all your boxes.

And try not to rush things. It is important to take your time getting to know someone before committing to a serious relationship.

Don’t let previous relationships keep you from getting back into the dating world – there are plenty of single women and single men out there looking for a life partner and committed relationship.

couple drinking wine at a wedding

Keep in mind dating doesn’t always mean marriage.

Don’t rush into marriage or propose too soon just because you’re in your 30s.

Take time to get to know your partner well and make sure you’re compatible on all levels.

Enjoy the process of dating and don’t put too much pressure on yourself or your partner.

Do not be afraid to try new things.

Whether it’s trying a new hobby or attending a social event, putting yourself out there can increase your chances of meeting someone special.

Look for alternative ways of meeting women as well. Don’t limit yourself to online dating or bars. Try joining clubs, classes, events, or groups that interest you.

Ask your friends, family, or coworkers for introductions. Be friendly and approachable wherever you go. There are some cities that are better than dating for others but there are people to be found everywhere.

The best way to meet plenty of people is to get out of your comfort zone.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help.

If you are feeling overwhelmed, consider enlisting the help of a dating coach, therapist, or trusted friend to help you navigate the dating scene.

To enter the dating game, don’t rely on a dating site. It’s important to date people in real life. Get to know other single people and see who you might want to take the next step with.

The first time you try to meet people in real life might feel awkward and might not go well but the important thing is that you keep trying to meet different people.

Set dating as a priority.

Don’t let work, hobbies, or other commitments distract you from finding a partner. Make time for dating and be consistent with your efforts.

Use your free time to try new hobbies that will help you meet new people. When you do things that you are interested in you’re more likely to meet and attract people like yourself.

Don’t delay meeting someone new or following up with potential matches.

Treat others with respect and kindness.

Don’t play games, ghost, cheat, manipulate, or abuse women in any way. Be honest, supportive, and generous with them.

Show them appreciation and make them feel special and you will instantly become a more desirable partner. 

Have fun!

Remember that dating should be enjoyable. Keep a positive attitude and have fun getting to know new people!

Things To Keep In Mind When Dating in Your 30s as a Man:

Being in your 30s, there are some things you’ll want to remember and give others grace for.

Most people have past relationships at this age.

For better or for worse, chances are the people you will be dating will have had at least one long term relationship previously.

Be respectful of their past, and be kind and understanding towards them. We all have different life experience and dating experience and it’s a good idea to be open and understanding. Doing this makes you a great partner and someone worth spending time with.

Be honest and direct with the people you date.

Don’t lead someone on or give them false hope when you know it won’t work out. It may save everyone some wasted time, energy, and emotions.

This also means maintaining the expectation that other will be honest with you. That means if someone says it is a not a good fit for them, let it go. It’s okay to pass on the relationship.

You might be dating single parents.

Being in your 30s means that your dating partner might have a child or two. Respect their role as a parent and be aware of the dynamics between you and your partner’s child.

Be patient and understanding, but also maintain boundaries.

You might have different life plans than your partner.

Some people in their 30s may still be looking to settle down while others may already be on their second marriage.

Be honest with each other about your expectations and be respectful of the differences.

Don’t let a bad date be the be-all-end-all.

If you had a bad date, don’t let it discourage you from continuing to date. Each person is different and there are plenty of people out in the world. Stay positive and keep looking for that special someone!

Some people will want to have sex on the first date.

Be honest and open with each other about expectations. Be sure you are both on the same page and that you’re comfortable with whatever decision is made.

Sexual wellness brand has surveyed over 2,000 adults to investigate how many of us have had sex on the first date. According to their survey, 59% of men have had sex on the first date and 43% of women have.

Figure out if this is something you’re open to and don’t be offended if your date is not.

man with his girlfriend at the restaurant

We have fewer single friends.

As we get older, chances are that our single friends have also found their partners. This means our social circle may be a little bit smaller and more likely to include couples.

It’s important to stay open to meeting new people at this stage in life. Join hobby groups, take classes, or explore online dating platforms to increase your chances of meeting someone special.

Finally, don’t be afraid to take risks and put yourself out there.

Dating in your 30s can feel intimidating, but it doesn’t have to be! With the right attitude, you can find a great person for a meaningful relationship. So keep your head high and take a chance on love! Good luck!

Final Thoughts on Dating as a Man in Your 30s

Dating in your 30s as a man can be a challenging yet rewarding experience. You have more experience and confidence than you did in your 20s, but that also means that you have stricter expectations.

Couple that with the pressures and responsibilities that every man in his 30s has to deal with and things get even more complicated. 

So how do you navigate the dating scene with maturity and grace? How do you find compatible partners who share your values and goals? How do you balance your personal and professional life while looking for love?

Hopefully, you found all the answers to these questions in this guide. The key is to be patient and take good care of yourself and the rest will follow.

Don’t be a jerk and try to have fun and you’ll find lots of success in your dating life. Good luck! 

About the Author

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